I'm a 59 year old American man. I'm divorced with 4 kids and 3 grandkids. I'm a retired elementary school teacher from California. I like playing games on the computer, listening to classic rock music, and thinking. I'm an atheist and liberal.
Title: Surviving the Wasteland: My Journey in Fallout 4
Introduction: Welcome, wasteland wanderers and fellow Vault Dwellers, to my blog where I document my adventures and share my thoughts on the post-apocalyptic world of Fallout 4. Join me as I navigate through the desolate wasteland, encounter intriguing characters, and uncover the secrets hidden within this immersive game.
The Lone Survivor: In this first blog post, I’ll introduce you to my character, the Lone Survivor. We’ll delve into their backstory, motivations, and the choices I make as I shape their path in this unforgiving world. From the moment I stepped out of Vault 111, the wasteland became my new home.
Exploring the Wasteland: Fallout 4 offers a vast open world filled with unique locations, each with its own story to tell. Join me as I explore the ruins of Boston, uncover hidden treasures, and stumble upon unexpected encounters. From the eerie halls of the abandoned hospitals to the bustling markets of Diamond City, there’s always something new to discover.
Surviving the Dangers: The wasteland is a dangerous place, filled with mutated creatures, raiders, and other hostile factions. In this blog post, I’ll share my strategies for combat, survival, and resource management. From scavenging for supplies to crafting weapons and armor, I’ll provide tips and tricks to help you stay alive in this harsh environment.
Building a Home: One of the unique features of Fallout 4 is the ability to build and customize settlements. In this blog post, I’ll discuss my experiences with settlement building, from constructing shelters to attracting new settlers. We’ll explore the various options available and the challenges that come with managing a thriving community in the midst of chaos.
Memorable Characters: Fallout 4 is known for its diverse and memorable characters. In this post, I’ll introduce you to some of the most intriguing individuals I’ve encountered on my journey. From the enigmatic synth detective Nick Valentine to the fearsome Brotherhood of Steel, we’ll explore the rich tapestry of personalities that make this game so captivating.
Moral Dilemmas: As I progress through the game, I often find myself faced with difficult choices that have far-reaching consequences. In this blog post, I’ll reflect on the moral dilemmas I encounter and the impact they have on the wasteland and its inhabitants. Join me as we explore the gray areas of morality and the weight of our decisions.
Conclusion: Fallout 4 is more than just a game; it’s an immersive experience that allows us to step into a post-apocalyptic world and shape our own destiny. Through this blog, I hope to share my thoughts, interactions, and discoveries, inviting you to join me on this thrilling adventure. So grab your Pip-Boy, load your laser rifle, and let’s embark on a journey through the wasteland together.
I asked ChatGPT to help me write a blog post. Above is its answer. Not bad! I don’t want the entire thing written for me, but I’m trying to use it to share what I’m doing instead of showing off my writing skills (or lack there of).
My anger could kill me someday. That’s what I realized today as I tried to recover from a self-inflicted near-stroke. I thought my head was going to explode. At least that’s what it felt like. This wasn’t during the anger and road rage. It was about 3 minutes after the incident. Let me give you some background.
I have struggled with anger management issues most of my adult life. When I was in my 20s and 30s I enjoyed the feeling of righteous indignation. This didn’t come from a religious grounding, it came from my own ego. When I was at my maximum anger, I felt powerful and confident. I KNEW I was justified in whatever I was mad about and in my level of hate. I was right. You were wrong. I can say whatever I want, because I’m right.
I didn’t question whether I should be yelling at people. If I was right, and I’m always right, then it’s not my problem if you can’t handle the truth. Ironically it was when I was working for the post office that I was forced to confront my anger. “Going Postal” was a catch-phrase for committing workplace violence. I was never violent. I have never punched someone in anger. Felt like it, but never have.
So it was during my first anger management peer group session that I finally started to question myself about my anger. There were people of all ages and ethnicities in our group. We talked about what we’ve done, what we’ve been through, and what the repercussions were for ourselves and the ones we love. To say it was eye opening is an understatement. It was a revelation.
Even with that revelation, I was a slow learner. I wasn’t yelling at my boss, but road rage was nearly a daily occurrence. Somebody cut me off? Ride that S.O.B.s tail. Someone driving slow in the fast lane? I’ll go around them, sometimes on the shoulder! I’ll get in front and then jam on the brakes. Why? To teach them to not drive slow in the fast lane.
Sometimes, believe it or not, people got mad at me! We would play stupid games and nearly get ourselves or those around us injured or killed. Why? Because these ignorant dumbasses need a lesson! I don’t know if it’s because I got older, but my body started reacting to these high-stress situations. When the adrenaline wore off my back would spasm. I could feel my heart beating hard in my chest. My head throbbed with pain in time with my pulse.
So for over 20 years now I’ve been wrestling with my inner demons. I’ve come to recognize the the situations that trigger a near-instant retaliation for a perceived insult or lack of fairness. If I’m centered and grounded or just in a good mood I can now let them roll off my back. So what happened today?
It started with a typical trigger. I’m slowing down to make a right turn at a stop sign. As I get to a few hundred feet from the stop sign, I see the car behind me change lanes and accelerate to get in front of me. Oh no you don’t! I sped up to try to block them, but they were able to get in front of me. Ok dumbass, you’re in front of me now. Hope you’re happy. You’re obviously in a big hurry.
So what do we do at the stop sign? Well they make their turn because nobody is coming. It’s Texas so the speed limit for this road is 70 mph. What does Miss In-A-Hurry do? Slowly, very slowly, accelerates in the lane in front of me. It’s 2 lanes each way. I go around. Now the fun begins!
As soon as I get back in front of her, she accelerates to get in front of me. As she passes I see her turn to me, yelling and flipping me off. When she’s in front, I do the point at my head and twirl my finger as the international symbol for your crazy. She must not have liked that because she hits her brakes and we play the tail-gate game. She’s a rank amateur. I’m a pro. She thinks she’s going to impede my progress by driving slow in the fast lane? That’s why there’s a shoulder, so I can pass you on the left, silly!
I wasn’t really mad. At least I didn’t feel angry. I was kind of mad, but I wasn’t seeing red and completely out of my head. I knew that I had started it. I shouldn’t have accelerated at the beginning before the stop sign. That was petty. I knew it before we got on the highway. I was definitely on her ass as we started accelerating. That’s why she was going slow. She was paying me back for trying to keep her from passing me before the stop sign.
The stupid road rage games made me miss my exit. She got off at the exit and I drove on to the next one to circle back. As I was taking the exit, I started to feel my pulse pounding in my head. I started to get a little nauseous. The pressure in my head was unrelenting. I was actually frightened I might stroke out. It took a good 15 minutes or so for the pressure to ease and my heart to stop pounding.
Wow. What an idiot! That lady wasn’t to blame. It was me. My fault. I started the games. I continued playing the games. As they say, “Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.” My lack of self-control almost killed me today. I’m almost 60 now. Is that how I want to die? A stroke caused by my reaction to what someone else did? No.
I’m going to learn from today. I’m going to appreciate the luck I had that today wasn’t the day I died. It gives me a chance to reflect on what I’ve learned about myself over the years. I’ll accept that I’m going to screw up and learn from those screw ups. I can see that I’ve made progress in managing my anger. My goal is to never go through that again. Next time? I’ll strive to not be petty and just let the morons be morons. Wish me luck!
I saw a post recently asking the question, “If you could ask God one question, what would it be?” So that got me to thinking…
Since most people in the US belong to some sect of Christianity, they picture their God as they believe Him to exist. They imagine asking Him about some detail about their faith they’ve struggled with in doubt. Or perhaps they’ve got a score to settle and they want to know why their loved one was taken. At least those are common threads.
My question would be something like why did you hide? I looked everywhere, inside and out. I never saw you. I called out many times. You never answered. Science has searched for you for thousands of years. Nothing. Physics hasn’t found Him. Biology hasn’t found a trace of a divine hand guiding evolution.
In fact the opposite has been found. The study of the natural world around us has lead to the scientific consensus that the Universe, Time, and Space began with The Big Bang. Life has evolved on Earth. Thoughts are bio electrical interactions among nerves in a brain. Before science, God was the most logical explanation for why we are here, how we got here, and what the difference is between living things and dead things. Now that we have science, insistence on His existence is just wishful thinking.
So if I were to find myself in the unlikely position of asking God one question it would be, “Where the hell were you?”
This sci-fi miniseries is into its 6th Season. I believe it has one more still to go but I’m not sure. It’s available on Prime Video for free if you already have Amazon Prime.
I’m currently at Season 2 Episode 3. I love how authentic the tech, politics, and cultures seem. It’s set several hundred years in the future. Mankind has expanded throughout the solar system. To the point that Mars and Earth have separate systems of government. And really cool spaceships and kickass Mars Marines. Both sides are itching for a fight. Then there are the Belters.
Belters inhabit the asteroid belt. That’s farther out from the sun than the orbit of Mars. It’s thousand (millions?) of rocks that orbit the sun between the orbits of Mars and Jupiter.
After generations of living in a low gravity environment, they’ve evolved a bit. Their differences in physiology from “Earthers” is significant enough that Earth’s gravity is used as a form of torture on them
I started watching this though not because of its quality, but simply because the name of the heroes’ spaceship is Rocinante. If you’re a Rush fan you recognize that name immediately! The writers hooked me just with that.
Fortunately it’s a well written, acted, and paced sci-fi /political /sexy /drama. I highly recommend it!
What got me to write about it was the episode I was just watching. Because in it, there is a spaceship called the Nauvoo. Now, if you are familiar with the LDS Church, you recognize that name! The ship is awesome. What really made me chuckle was how close to home it hit.
There’s a scene where one of the lead characters is talking to an Elder in a church waiting area. He’s being given a 3D tour of the ship that’s being built. I don’t want to give away any spoilers, but his reaction to it was something I could definitely emphasize with. It made me think how much would I agree to so I could ride, and raise my family, in that ship?
Anyway, LDS or not, this is a reliably good series. So far. It does have nudity. Close your eyes if you’re squeamish. 😉
This is my third try at writing a paragraph and it isn’t going well. I can’t seem to get my thoughts in order. I sat down to write something. At first I was going to write about my day. I deliver for Amazon. I was going to write about what I saw and thought about. But it was so choppy I deleted it. Then I thought I’d write about the mind and soul. But I couldn’t figure out how to start or even what my point was going to be.
So here’s my third attempt. I’m writing about why I struggle with writing. Just writing this much has helped me see that if I want to write, I better have at least a topic in mind. But more than that, I need to actually want to write because I have something to say and not because I want to accomplish something.
Ok. Here’s the thing. I don’t have hope for the future. Either mine or the whole planet for that matter. This lack of hope has several causes. So I’m going to try and get them down before they elude me. Again.
First, my life has taken some crappy turns and left permanent scars. Everyone has pain and misfortune in their life. So I don’t claim to have had an especially hard life. There are billions of people who I’m sure would love to trade their problems for mine. But I can only report what I’ve seen and done. I’ve arrived at 60 with steamer trunks of baggage. I am not normal. I’m damaged. I am deeply cynical about life and what it’s for.
Secondly, I’m an atheist. I don’t believe there is such a thing as a soul. So I don’t believe that I am going to survive after I die. Whatever years are left to me, they number less than the ones I’ve lived already. I am declining. Mentally and physically. Yes I exercise and am on prescribed medications for what ails me. But everything we try to do to prolong our life is doomed to failure. As Jim Morrison said, “Nobody here gets out alive.”
Lastly, the world we live on and the culture we live in is failing. Just looking at the news we see political and social unrest. There’s climate change, war, disease, and a host of other problems we seem unable or unwilling to solve.
Now don’t think I just sit around dressed in black lamenting about the unfairness of it all. I enjoy being alive. I like watching how things evolve. I see the beauty in nature. I’m inspired by great music and great ideas. I love my family and what few friend(s) I have.
But fundamentally, it’s all going to end some day. All attempts at progress are futile. Even if thousands of years from now we’ve developed into a multi-planetary society and have cured all forms of cancer there is no hope for the future. Why?
Because the Universe, like everything else, had a beginning, has a present, and will have an end. We live in a special time where there is light. We can see the other stars and galaxies around us now. But someday, billions of years from now, the Universe will expand to the point that anyone alive on a planet won’t be able to see any other star. The night sky will be completely black. Someday in the far distant future the last star will collapse on itself and the light of the Universe will be extinguished.
So what? That’s hundreds of billions of years down the road! It’s the inevitability of it that gets me. Long before that, life will have been incinerated here on Earth. Our sun will in billions of years use up all of its hydrogen. The sun will expand engulfing Mercury and Venus and possibly the Earth too. Even if the Earth isn’t inside the sun it will be burnt to a cinder.
So what? That’s billions of years down the road! Life evolves. That includes humans. There weren’t humans a million years ago. There’s little reason to think there will be humans a million years from now. Our species will die out or become something new.
So what? That’s a million years down the road! If we’re lucky we might live to see 100 years of life. 100 laps around the sun. It’s very difficult for us to conceive of time scales in the millions or even thousands of years. But we know from archeology and geology that earthquakes, volcanoes, tsunamis, and other cataclysmic events have occurred in the past and will occur again in the future.
So what? Hey! I could be wrong! In fact, I am almost certainly wrong about many things. Perhaps this world is a snow globe for God(s). We’re here and He’s there watching us go about our lives. Or maybe we’re in a simulation? We might just be a very complicated Sims game and I’m just a program that thinks I’m alive in a real world.
Wow. I have had this idea rolling around in my head for awhile. I guess it wanted to come out and say hi. I really thought I was going to write about driving for Amazon in Texas. But my brain wouldn’t let me write about that until I had unloaded this apparently. I’m driving again tomorrow if the weather isn’t too bad. I’ll try to write about that next time.
🤦♂️ Oh no. I think instead of 2 and 1/4 cups o’ flour. I put in two 1/2 cups. + 1/4. Dang it.
It tastes great. But wet. Darn . Ok adding flour to remaining batter.
Look away. They’ll be eaten. Hideous as they are to look at.
My brain was trying to tell me there was something wrong with it. Oh well, the crisps I made are delicious! After getting the right consistency, I knew what my brain was trying to tell me.
Oh yes!
I was afraid of burning this batch. 9 minutes. Probably could have gone up to a minute more. Oh well. They taste great, but aren’t something to show off. 6/10
Now that I’ve established the expectation for myself to write every day…it’s a chore! Gah! I hate this feeling. When I’m not typing, I’m thinking. I’m always thinking. But isn’t everybody? Don’t you think about what you did, what you’re doing, or what you’re going to do all of the time?
Ok, so maybe not all of the time. That’s why we like good books, movies, or tv shows. They take us away from our lives. We stop thinking about ourselves and get sucked into the drama, we get inspired by beauty, love, or some virtue, or we go through a roller coaster of emotions because we’re empathizing with characters in the story. Sometimes, we escape because we don’t want to think about the past, present, or future.
I was asked why I want to blog. I want to be understood. But there’s more than that. I want to be appreciated for my uniqueness. I’m a man with unpopular opinions. I don’t choose to believe the things I believe because they are unpopular. I feel like I’ve arrived at these opinions because I am willing to explore uncomfortable truths. Or at least uncomfortable for the majority of people I interact with.
Over the decades, I’ve felt like I’m on a mission to find the truth. What truth? Reality. The cold hard facts of life.
So anyway, I’ve got these opinions see. I want to write about the things I think about. I want to write about science, philosophy, religion, politics, and many other things that pop into my head. Believe me, they’re popping in and out ALL of the time!
Which is part of the frustration of sitting down to write. Thoughts have been going through my head all day, but now that I’m here behind my keyboard I can’t think of any of them! So frustrating. Hours ago when I had some good thinking going on, I didn’t want to stop what I was watching to write.
I was watching a documentary on Netflix called Everything and Nothing. It was a very well produced science program about the Universe (Everything) and what “empty” space is like at the sub-atomic level (Nothing). Now, if I was going to write about that, how would I go about it? Am I going to try to rehash the whole show? I feel like I have to in order to provide context for what I was thinking while I was watching it. But that would be exhausting and I couldn’t do as good of a job as the production team that put the show together.
Ok, so I looked back at the beginning of this page. Daily Writing was my title. I didn’t sit down prepared to write about anything. I just had put off writing all day, knowing that I was “supposed” to write something, and then decided to quit putting it off. So I sat down, got out the keyboard, and started writing whatever was in my head at that moment.
I should probably take some writing classes. I should watch YouTube videos on how to create a “successful” blog. I should read other blogs to see how they do it. But I won’t. Or I might start to watch a video and then get bored and quit.
So here’s where I feel like I want to explain why I’m like this. But to be honest, I’m not exactly sure. Trying to figure out why I am the way I am has been my life preoccupation. When I’m not thinking about other things, I’m thinking about myself. ADHD, PTSD, OCPD, Anxiety, Self-Esteem and Depression. These different diagnoses, both self-diagnosed and doctor diagnosed, have filled my life. There’s something fundamentally wrong with me. I go back and forth between trying to “fix” or at least improve myself, or trying to just accept the way I am and move on.
I don’t want to plan, but then again I want a plan. I want my life to be more organized so I can accomplish the things I want to do with the time left. But I don’t want anyone to tell me what to do. Apparently that includes myself. I can’t make myself do what I want to do. I want the dishes done every day. But I don’t want to do the dishes. I want to eat healthy meals, but I don’t want to prepare and cook food. I want to be in shape, but I don’t want to work out. I want more money, but I don’t want to work for it.
It’s not laziness. That’s what I’ve called it, along with my parents when I was younger, all of my life. Occasionally, I’ll get super motivated and finish most of the things I’ve put off. But I won’t finish everything and then dishes will sit, clothes will stay on the floor where I dropped them, and I’ll leave any other lingering tasks for the next time I feel like doing them.
I say it’s not laziness because I’ve seen a lot of YouTube videos and Facebook posts about Executive Function. People like me have a mental problem, not a personality defect. Even though that’s what I was brought up to believe about myself. I know intellectually that I have a complex personality disorder. I know that I’ve gone through trauma as an adult and as a child. But I feel like any attempts to explain the causes of my behavior are just finding excuses for being lazy.
Fake it ’till you make it. I hope that by just powering through and writing something everyday, I’ll be able to improve. If I try to plan what I’m going to do, I often don’t even get started. I quit during the planning part. But I know that if I don’t at least write, if I don’t at least get something down, I’ll just lose interest in the attempt at having a blog. I have so much I want to say it’s often hard to choose one thing. Look at this page. There’s no planning. There’s no real topic. But I’m tired of writing now, so this will have to do.
One last thing. I started writing about my thoughts about the Starship launch last night. I know I need to finish it. I hate the thought that it’s not done and I have to go back to it. Isn’t that nuts?
My first visit to Boca Chica was in April 2021. As a lifelong NASA nerd I was eager to see what SpaceX was up to. I couldn’t believe how close I could get to the launch site! You could drive down Hwy 4 and the rocket was right there on the other side of the fence! If you drove all the way to the beach and parked, you could climb over the sand dunes and have an unobstructed view of the facility. At that time only the first of the 8 huge ground support tanks had been installed. The orbital launch mount was just some big 3′ diameter cylinders sticking up out of the ground. SN15 (Starship serial number 15) was sitting on the suboribital pad.
It was scheduled to launch soon. It was going to fly up to about 10,000 feet. Then it would shut off it’s engines and pivot so it was parallel to the ground. This was to simulate a re-entry. It would fall back to Earth using it’s flaps to guide it back to the landing area. Then just before it was to hit the ground it would relight an engine, pivot back to an upright position, and land (as gently as possible). Hopefully without blowing up like it’s predecessors had.
It would eventually be successful, but not while I was there. SpaceX would spend the next two years getting ready for the main event. While Starship itself was impressive, it was never meant to fly by itself. It was 30 ft in diameter and 164 ft tall. But it would be stacked on a booster. While Starship has 6 engines, 3 for normal atmosphere and 3 for the vacuum of space, the booster would have 33! When stacked, the world’s most powerful rocket would stand nearly 400′!
First fully stacked Starship, with Booster 4 and Ship 20. They wouldn’t actually fly (Getty images)
During those 2 years, I watched the progress on YouTube. They had static fires of engines. They redesigned the piping for the fuel tanks. They pressurized tanks until they blew up. They just kept improving by trying new things to see if they’d work. Some things did, those that didn’t were redesigned. It was fascinating watching the process in real-time.
After several launch dates were announced and then rescheduled, by the beginning of April 2023, it looked like all the forms had been filed, all of the tests had been completed, and they were really going to “light this candle”! It was announced that April 17, 2023 at 8:20am Starship would make it’s first orbital flight attempt. After years of waiting, I was going to get my chance to see it live!
I got into my hotel on South Padre Island, TX around 3:30am on the 16th. I slept until noon. I knew they were going to close the road leading to the site at midnight, so I drove over to Boca Chica to see it up close.
I was eager to drive down hwy 4 and see the changes in person that I had seen on YouTube. Of course there were many more people that Sunday than 2 years before. The traffic was pretty bad. They already had the beach closed off, so I didn’t try to get on the dunes. In fact, I didn’t really see a place to park, so I just drove down, turned around, and drove back. It was disappointing that I couldn’t hang out and take some pictures, but what I saw was still impressive!
SN15 only had a band of black heat resistant tiles wrapped around it’s waist back in 2021. SN24 which was stacked on Booster 7 was nearly completely covered in the black octagonal tiles it would rely on to protect it during the fiery re-entry into Earth’s atmosphere. It contrasted starkly with the smooth silver sides of the booster. It was thrilling to think that soon that huge monster of a rocket was going to fly. I couldn’t wait!
It was hard to get to sleep that night, but I immediately got up when the alarm went off! I didn’t want to pay the $20 for parking at Isla Blanca Park, so my plan was to walk there. It was the closest unobstructed view of the launch that I knew of. I headed off with my binoculars and folding chair to find a place to watch from.
It was a 2 mile walk. I thought that wouldn’t be a problem. It wasn’t! Walking there, that is. It was walking back that was the Bataan Death March for me. Man am I out of shape!
Anyway I got there about an hour before scheduled liftoff. I found a nice place just off the path with just a few people in front of me. It wouldn’t matter once the countdown got to zero. We were about 5 miles from the rocket. It was clearly visible in my binoculars. It looked different from the day before. Now it had a nice frosty coat of ice around the tanks full of super-cooled liquid methane and liquid oxygen. It had billowing clouds of white vapor venting from the sides as it waited like a chained dragon to leap into the sky.
One thing I hadn’t counted on was the lousy 5G cell service. Thousands of people were all trying to stream the coverage at the same time. I couldn’t get any updates. I could hear some of the coverage from other people’s phones who had better luck than I did. It got to about T -40 seconds, when they had to scrub the launch. Dang it! Here we go again!
The walk back was excruciating. I had to stop several times to rest. My legs were just aching all the way up to my back. By the time I got back to my room, I just collapsed on the bed and slept for a few hours.
One of the positive outcomes of pushing the launch to the 20th was that my brother in law David would be able to come down to south Texas and join me. I got us a room at a different hotel than I’d stayed in earlier. It was closer (and nicer!).
When he got there we drove over to Boca Chica to see the construction area and launch pad. Unfortunately it was past dark and they didn’t have a lot of light. It was hard to see anything. Bummer!
There’s a rocket there
After we got back to the hotel we made our plans for the following morning’s launch. Since David was a disabled veteran, I knew he’d be able to park for $5 instead of $20. So we wouldn’t have to walk nearly as far as I had on Monday.
The next morning we got up early and headed over to Isla Blanca park. We were early enough that we got a decent parking place. We then grabbed our chairs and headed for the beach.
We took our chairs and set up on the beach with a mostly unobstructed view of the rocket. It was a little foggy, but really, not too bad. Through the binoculars I could see the clouds of vapor as they fueled the rocket.
David and I
Once again, I couldn’t stream the coverage of the launch so I wasn’t sure what the status was. I caught some of the chatter around me and knew that everything was going smoothly. It must’ve been about T-40 seconds or so when they had a pause in the countdown. I was afraid we were going to have another scrub.
But the hold lasted only a few minutes and they started the countdown back up again. A loud cheer erupted from the crowd and I got my binoculars out and started to record on my phone.
As I write this it’s been more than a month since the launch. I’m trying to remember details but that’s a hard task for someone with the memory I’m cursed with. But I’ll give it my best shot.
I remember looking through the binoculars and seeing an orange glow illuminating the Starship from below. Huge billowing clouds of exhaust rolled out and grew as 30 of its 33 engines tried to lift 6 million pounds of rocket and fuel off the launch pad.
I remember watching Saturn V launches and how slow the rocket would rise as it began its journey to the moon. I knew from watching previous videos that it would take 8 seconds from when the first engines were ignited to when they were all at full power and the hold down clamps would be released. But it was strange watching all of that fire and fury, but no movement.
Then the sound arrived. The crowd was cheering wildly, but I don’t remember hearing them after the wall of sound hit us. If you’ve ever seen a rocket launch on video, there’s a kind of crackling sound that rockets produce. But nothing compares to being there. Because you FEEL IT! It hits your chest and you’re just in a state of awe. So much power!
As the rocket finally started to climb, I tracked with my binoculars in my left hand and braced my phone against them with my right. Although it started slow (and a little tilted?) it quickly gained speed and altitude. I noticed an occasional green streak of exhaust as it climbed. This meant that some of the engines were failing. I started to become concerned that it wasn’t going to make it. I was almost looking straight up at it, my body bending and twisting to keep it in view. Was it going to fall out of the sky?
After a few minutes it was hard to see what it was doing. Something was wrong. It was tumbling. The Starship was supposed to separate from the booster and ignite its own engines. That never happened. It remained stubbornly connected. Eventually they triggered the destruct mechanism and it exploded. I don’t know if I actually saw it explode. It was pretty high up and it was hard to make out what was going on.
Lift off!
I’d been waiting for this launch for quite awhile. I’ve been following the development of Starship for years now. While it was definitely exciting, I haven’t been able to shake the feeling that it was a let down.
You see I’ve spent the last year planning to get an RV so I could travel between Florida, California, & Texas. I thought I would spend my retirement chasing launches of Starships and Falcon Heavy(s). Maybe I still will. After all, this was not a very successful test, so maybe a successful one would be twice as awesome? Also, one of the greatest things about SpaceX is the booster comes back and lands to be refurbished and reused. However, with the Starship booster there’s going to be a twist. They’re not going to return with landing legs. They’re going to catch it with huge mechanical arms! Now that will be a show!
The reason I’m so excited for this particular rocket is what they’re planning to do with it. First, it’s going to be the lander for the next moon mission Artemis. That’s pretty cool. But that’s just the start.
They’re building a factory to produce Starships on an assembly line. When they’ve finished developing it with prototypes, they’re going to make hundreds of these monsters! The factory will be able to crank out 1 new Starship every three days! Why do they need that many? Because we’re going to Mars! Not just to plant a flag and collect some rocks. This is to colonize Mars. Millions of tons of supplies and thousands of people! If I’m still alive I’m volunteering to go. I don’t know if they’ll want old people up there, but it couldn’t hurt to ask!